An unusually large number of natural disasters took place on Tuesday, September 25, 2007 . Since the majority of the media was focused on covering the launch of Microsoft's Halo 3 for the Xbox 360, many of these tragedies went below the radar of the general public. At last count, five volcanoes erupted, two of which were previously thought dormant. Seven tropical storms and three hurricanes made landfall, causing untold loss of life. India was hit by no less than nine earthquakes and countless homes in Costa Rica were wiped out by a flash flood, Phil Spector beat a murder wrap, OJ Simpson made bail, and a single tornado ripped through a record 23 trailer parks.

Early this morning , the Vatican issued a press release explaining the numerous disasters. 'God took the day off to play Halo 3. He had only planned on playing through the first level, but the graphics were so good, that even the Lord couldnt pull himself away.' Pope Benedict XVI called a press conference to answer questions on behalf of the Almighty. 'I have to take some of the blame here. God and I were talking on Xbox Live and I asked him to join me in some co-op levels. And soon, we were playing 2v2 Slayer games. We went undefeated all day long. I pwned a few n00bs but the Heavenly Father did most of the work. As you know, God gets the best ping times.' The Pope would not disclose the Creators gamertag.

God was unavailable for comment.

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